We Hardly Knew Ye (Yet Good Riddance)

Let's all raise our glasses and drink to John Ashcroft's last day as Attorney General of these United States. Ol' Johnny boy gave his final speech today, lambasting those who railed against the Patriot Act and him for the last four years. Here was a man who LOST the Senate race that he had campaigned for in 2000 (man, why does God hate Missouri Democrats? :)) and then gets a job promotion by Georgie W. Ashcroft then spends the next four years dedicating himself to running a hermetically sealed Justice Department that has a fetish for library users, nude statues, and Oregonians and Texans who believe that the First Amendment protects them from government intrusion into their personal lives. A perfect example of how W. "owed" the conservative right-wingnuts of the evangelical GOP; his new AG is from a conservative Midwestern state (nothing against Missouri), from an Assemblies of God denomination (again, nothing against the AOG; I've had friends in this denom, though everyone has to recognize that the AOG doesn't necessarily fit into even the moderate wing of evangelical Christianity) that rails against Constitutional rights and privacy rights in the name of promoting goodness and the protection of Americans' freedom. I haven't felt threatened because anyone dying of stomach cancer in Oregon wanted to kill him/herself, nor have I felt threatened because some idiot mouthbreather on-line has checked out the Anarchist's Cookbook. If someone being recruited by al Qaeda is searching for bomb-related material, wouldn't that person be a little better funded and supported then some moron who makes acid and pipe bombs from his grandmother's kitchen in the local trailer park? Give me a break; whether people are downloading the latest skin flick or reading Pollstar on-line, I don't think we've stopped too many members of Osama bin Ladin from rallying newbies in Pakistan. Isn't the "insurgence" in Iraq and places that are politically more instable than, say, Bethlehem, Pennsylvania? Good riddance, jerk. As the nation's highest-ranking law enforcement official, you sure did your best to stop assault rifles from getting into the hands of bad people. Guns (which are weapons and ARE NOT protected by the second amendment) kill more people almost weekly in this country than airplane-armed terrorists do in a half-century and yet the NRA pulled your strings, you little tool. Good riddance. Go back to the Show Me State and see just how many people will follow your example.
Lest we be careful for what we wish for; we have to remember that Ashcroft's successor is the man that drafted and outlined the Bush Administration's policy on torture. Isn't it good to know that we've replaced Eichmann with Himmler? Alberto Gonzales, like Condi Lies, will get appointed, and for the first time since Henry Kissinger, this country will have someone truly worthy of the title War Criminal serving in the administration (unless, that is, you count half of Reagan's staff involved, like John Pointdexter, in Iran-Contra). Tomorrow night is the State of the Union, and before George W. Bush even speaks, I can tell you that it is already very bad. Here's why: education, health care, and Social Security are broken. So, here's the plan on how to fix them: PRIVATIZE. Less government regulation or intervention. C'mon, people, it's worked in California for PG&E, in Texas for Enron, for most Americans' health care plans (that are watching most of their major drugs be pulled from the market), and the military that's fighting the war in Iraq. What isn't broken are the plans to further smear the line between church and state, push government propaganda through the media, and deregulate all communications conglomerates. No coincidence that SBC just bought AT&T right after Michael "Tool" Powell is stepping down from the FCC. The government doesn't have the right to tell businesses to treat customers fairly but does have the power to govern what people can or can't watch. Adolf, Heinrich, and Josef: thank you for setting such wonderful examples; we're watching our own Republican leaders follow in your footsteps. They're one-upping you guys, though, because instead of doing everything in the name of the fatherland or for racial purity (too devisive), they're doing it in the name of libery, freedom, and the love of Jesus.
George W. Bush and the neocon movement are the anti-Christs.